Trivial Pursuit: Uganda Edition

First, I’d like to begin this post with a brief explanation (apology) as to why it has been almost a month since my last update. Every single day that I have been here has contained one, if not more life changing experience. And while I want nothing more than to share every last one of them with you, it takes every ounce of anything I have in me to process everything that has happened. Simply put, after convincing myself that the events of the day really did happen—that I really did see what I saw, I have absolutely NOTHING left to give. I know that sounds disgustingly selfish, but it’s the truth. On a similar note, I feel like nothing I say, no words that I write can possibly express what I am experiencing on a daily basis and what an impact it is having on who I am. That being said, all of you who take the time to read this blog—every single one of you—deserve to experience these things with me, because you are the reason I am here. I suspect the longer I live here, the less overwhelming all of these experiences will be, which will make them much easier to write about (let’s hope my suspicions are right).

What I’m going to attempt to do in this blog post is catch you up on any Ugandan laws (or lack thereof) facts, customs, sayings, etc. that have just totally blown my mind. Which is pretty much all of them. These are in no particular order and with no real train of thought behind them so buckle up, because it’s going to be a bumpy ride. Which brings me to the first bit of trivia….

1.) In Uganda, buckling your seatbelt is for sissies. That’s right, no seat belt laws here. And to top it off, your child doesn’t have to be buckled up, or even ride in a carseat. But, you can be assured, any ride you take WILL be a bumpy one.
2.) Along those same lines, a passenger wearing a helmet while on a boda will definitely lead to some snickering from the passers-by. (I still always try to find a boda driver who is wearing a helmet—suggests some level of cautiousness on his part)
3.) To pass a car in Uganda is called to ‘Overtake’—and that is exactly what they do...and they do so whenever the hell they feel like it. There are no passing lanes in Uganda, and if there were, they would most certainly be ignored.
4.) The traffic here in Uganda, namely Kampala, is absolute MADNESS. I can’t even describe it. I promise to take a video the next time I feel brave enough to open my eyes while going through it.

**Now, let’s move on to common words, phrases, customs, etc. because they are most definitely my favorite

1.) The national language in Uganda is Luganda….here are some key words or phrases that you must know in order to ensure that you are not complete ripped off at every opportunity, or that you don’t die on a boda.

-“Muzungu”-  what Ugandans call white people…what white people call themselves 
-“Nedda” (pronounced Neh-da) - No
-“Kale” (pronounced Cal-le)- Ok
-“Oli Otya”-  How are you?
-“Wangi”- Pardon/What did you say?(as you can imagine, I use this one A LOT)
-“Ssebo” (prounounced Say-bo)- Sir
-“Nnyabo” (pronounced Nyabo)- Maam 
-“Mpola! Mpola!”- Slow down (I use this often with boda drivers)

2.) Ugandans eat with their hands--no untensils desired or required. It is seen as a sign of respect for us to do the same, although utensils are always provided when Muzungus are around.

3.)You will haggle with Ugandans over prices for almost everything…especially Boda rides and things you buy from roadside markets or craft markets. I was advised to just say, “needa muzungu prices” (no muzungu prices). Thusfar, it has been rather effective. They usually laugh and say “ok” and lower the price.

4.) Now, this is my FAVORITE custom, and I suspect that I will be adopting it fairly quickly. Whenever you ask a Ugandan a question, they don’t answer you with a verbal “Yes”. Instead, they look at you and raise their eyebrows (sometimes they’ll throw in an “mm” before they eyebrow raise). But most of the time, the eyebrow answer is the most you’re going to get. It is particularly adorable when a young child does it. I am determined to take a picture of someone answering in that way, and will post a picture as soon as I get one.

I know that I am missing SO many, but I am just too tired to think right now. I will be adding to this post as I remember or learn new ones…so keep checking back!

Also, if any of my Ugandan friends/friends living in Uganda who are reading this, please feel free to add any that I left out that you find important in the comment box :)

all of my love and happiness,
Bliss xxxx